I woke up the other morning with a black tongue. I thought I was dying of the plague…I have had a stomachache all week. I know I’m slightly more stressed than usual, I know that my normal routine is off a bit. Could be one of those things. Or it could be from getting my three squares a day at this fine establishment, located just off campus:
Well, I only ate there Tuesday-Friday.
Just kidding. I have not eaten there at all, I only pass it everyday on my way to school and snicker. If I ate there, I would most certainly have to shop somewhere like Dress Barn. Not trying to start any beef with Dress Barn loyal shoppers here, it just seems like the fine people at DB are making certain assumptions about their customers. See, I just don’t think I could shop in a place that ever so not subtly suggests that you are a cow. Just like I could never stomach eating in a place that advertises with an elephant and the words “Jumbo” and “Family”.
Stop talking about Dress Barn and explain your black tongue!
Well, it’s really not all that exciting. Apparently if you take Pepto-Bismol, especially the tablet kind, right before bed, a chemical reaction occurs on your tongue and turns it black. The end.
(Maybe this post should have been left hidden away in the drafts folder where it belongs.)